Throughout my life, the notion that humans are extremely evolved primates has been effectively treated as fact. I would go so far as to say even though it’s a scientific _theory_, it’s treated as fact. Indeed, I, myself, have chuckled at a Bill Hicks (RIP) joke that “people who don’t believe in evolution seem kinda un-evolved.”
The thing is, it’s not that I don’t believe in evolution. I very much believe in evolution. However, that is not the same thing as believing humans are primates. Is it possible humans and apes share DNA? Absolutely. Is it possible humans biologically adapted to live on the savannah in Africa? Surely. However, that does not make humans primates.
So far as I can tell, humans are from somewhere else — another planet or something. Then, they were possibly genetically mixed with primates. And I don’t mean they bred with monkeys. Rather, I suspect human genes were mixed with ape genes like billions of “years” ago.
This sounds ludicrous, I know. However, the notion that we humans are the _only_ ape to shed all of its fur, walk only upright, and build an advanced civilization with wars and A/C seems a bit strange, too.